Pages

Tuesday, 16 June 2015

The big scary bear


May 19, 2015 12:47:38 PM.jpg



WALT- write a story from a picture
Success Criteria -
- Use different types of sentences.
- Use adjectives, adverbs and expensive words.

Chris was at home when he saw the TV say that there is a great golf game in town .He thought about how he was a very great golfer in the late 90’s.

He set off and came at a stop at the golfer's game place and played for a while. He was winning most of the times but he lost about three games.  When he was on the last game he was one second away from getting his ball in but suddenly a big terrifying brown grumpy bear jumped out and made him hit his ball straight across the field.

They stared nervously for a while then  they ran for about 3 miles until they got to their cars but the bear was coming too fast and he had no chance of getting in. Chris got his golf club and whacked the brown bear several times until he was unconscious. Then he called up the animal control and they took care of everything. At the end of the day when the bear was gone they played on with their game and Chris won at the end .

By Natalia



10 comments:

leilani @ Glen Innes School said...

Talofa Lava Natalia

I like how you presented your story about the Bear. I also like how you described the bear and how the man was feeling. I also like stories, that have a great topic title. You should write more stories. dis you enjoy writing this story?

Shanelle said...

Hello Natalia
I like your problem that was in you story. I like how you have used lots of great adjectives. I had done writing like this before and it was fun. Do you enjoy writing?

Shanelle said...

Hello Natalia
I like your problem that was in you story. I like how you have used lots of great adjectives. I had done writing like this before and it was fun. Do you enjoy writing?

Andrea said...

Hi Natalia
I really enjoyed reading your story. It was really interesting. I remember playing golf with my oldest brother Chris. It was plenty of fun. I liked how you used many interesting adjectives.

Keep up the amazing work Natalia.

Ifa said...

Kia Ora Natalia,
I like your problem that was in you story. I like how you have used lots of great adjectives. Do you enjoy writing?

Yazmin Aung said...

Kia Orana Natalia,
Your story had a good problem. Yoou also use lots of expensive words. In my class we write descriptive paragraphs. What type of writing is your favourite?

Lauren F said...

HI my name is Lauren I am from Tamaki Primary School and I am a year 8 student. I read through your story and it was really descriptive.I like the way how you use a lot of adjectives in your story.

Keep it up Natalia :)

From Lauren FIfita

Megan said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Megan said...

Kia Ora Natalia,
Your story was very interesting. You have used lots of good adjectives in your story. I really like how you chose the right words to use your writing. Did you enjoy writing this story?

Keep up the good work :)

Lorenzo@GLEN Innes school said...

Kia orana Natalia
Your story is good and is very interesting. You have used powerful words it is nice keep it up.

Post a Comment